Demon's Souls: Three Years Later (Part 6)
Oct. 13, 2013Demon’s Souls: Three Years Later (Part 6)
After heroically destroying zero bosses or creatures of note in Chapter 5, our protagonist (Ded 2) feels pretty good about the treasure he’s collected and will likely never use. Having a good number of souls to spend our adventure this time begins after a shopping spree. With an executive decision to thrill the masses Ded 2 decides to buy some magic spells to see what happens when a melee and archer player tries to get out of his comfort zone.
Chapter 6Magic: The Slathering
I was off! Ready to begin my new adventures as a spell swordish kinda guy. Maybe.
Where to? I had unfinished business in Latria after Befowler’s mail breaker did him in. With an hour and a half to play, surely I would be able to get past the Fool’s Idol(1) with relative ease. My former nemesis, the Mindflayer had not been troubling me much and most of the pitfalls were clearly no match for me, naturally (of course).
Demon’s Prank(2) at the ready, I entered the Tower. You know that Mindflayer on the balcony area? I thought to myself, I wonder if I demon’s prank through the door if he’ll check that out and I can land a comical backstab. Guess what? Nope. After I get hit with a ball of lightning I’m reminded of why these guys are such huge %!&*#! *&♪$!@♥% that make me want to rip off their head and ♫%@# down their throats!
I of course get my face pretty badly tentacled and thrown to the stone floor. I get up and get blasted by that sound wave attack they do. Dead. Great way to start the night. I try it again but I’m pretty sure he sees me, making my deceptive audio tricks pretty useless. I get paralyzed again. Out come the tentacles. Out comes the sound wave. This time I roll away. Success! And get blasted by more lightning. These guys just don’t quit do they?
Lesson learned I just wait for him in the doorway from now on and come out slashing. The one after him is also not falling for it but I can sneak up and get in a backstab. I notice something that I’m still laughing about today. As a result, I will from now on ONLY try to backstab Mindflayers. After you, ever sogentlyhorrifically and violently, stab their spine their face smashes into the floor (bet you wish you hadn’t done that to me earlier now PUNK!). After their face smashes into the stone floor they do a little….wait for it…hahaha
….I still can’t believe this….HA HA HAHA…..they do a little….ha ha ha…..front flipand come to rest. I don’t know how hard you need to kick someone off of your dragon longsword +2 to make them do a flip after smashing their face; but if anyone deserves that treatment it’s these guys. Even if they were pushovers they’d deserve it for that damn bell they keep ringing. We get it! Ambience already!
I continue on and realize a few things about how impressive the audio is in this place. In addition to the bells, the slamming of the prison door from Lord Rydell High(3), the singing, etc. etc. It’s enough to be called masterful. And what’s up with those weird pot/cauldron things with the green vapors? Smashing them, while fun, doesn’t provide any clues as to what that vapor is.
Getting back to the noise. I make my way to the Royal (4). I can’t decide which is more oppressive, her relentless dissonant singing….or the weight of the silence when you enter her room finally. I buy a rapier to make her feel like her existence is meaningful (hint: it’s not) and move on.
I meet a wonderful guy named Sage Freke-azoid(5) but don’t have the means to get him out yet (aka a “key”). I meet the ghost of Rydell High and again have to just keep moving. I wish he’d stop with the yelling and slamming already. Give it a rest buddy. I’ll get to you in due time.
Pop Quiz: Is it more sad that I know for sure exactly where the set of fluted armor is, or that I still pick it up despite the fact that it’s the armor I started with?
I get to the ball of dudes(6) and decide I’ll try to fight them head on.
I return to the ball of dudes and recall just how awesome archery is.
I take on an entire group of guys like a boss, justifying a small measure of chest puffing. These weren’t ordinary enemies either. These guys had large ceramic pots for armor that makes them super dangerous(7).
Some loot from a crystal lizard reminds me again how awesome archery is (I know there’s a ledge somewhere so why bother running toward it?).
Pop Quiz round two: Is the above thing I asked about even as remotely sad as the fact that I insist on opening EVERY cell on this floor despite knowing that they’re ALL teeny tiny and that if I can’t see loot, there is no loot?
I have little difficulty finding all the treasures to be had. I get to the crossbow tower(8). I’ve read recently that you can roll through the arrows and approach it from the front which sounds waaaaaay more bad*** than sneaking around and pulling the lever in the back. Since this is a fantasy game let’s pretend that I didn’t face a horrible death and I was able to do that successfully.
Hypothetically speaking, since I clearly did NOT have this happen nor did I sneak around the back and use the lever, but if one were to try to block the arrows as a test it’s interesting to note that it diminishes all your stamina and breaks your guard. The next volley kills a person. Not me though. I rolled through them like a champ. Yup. That’s what happened.
Which is why it’s weird that I would go around the back way at all. Or that I would use this particular point in time to go back to the Nexus to drop off treasure and adjust my spell. I’d tried Demon’s Prank a few more times and I discovered it’s not fooling anyone. Several near death experiences and I had decided to use the spell that should make me hard to be seen. I’ll skip to the end on that one too. That one is also not fooling anyone. Perhaps my helmet is too shiny to be missed. Oh well, appearance does matter.
So I go the back way and run up the first tower. I think to myself, you could have an interesting competition on these spiral stairs. In order to have maximum speed you need to be able to use both joysticks effectively. So yes….I’m suggesting we have Demon’s Souls Spiral Staircase time trials. Fastest time wins!!!! The silver catalyst (the treasure at the end of this path) is no problem to acquire. I work my way back down and think, do I go after the phantom in hiding or the other staircase first? I decide that I’ll kill the phantom so I can deftly jump down for treasure after the fight and not be bothered(9).
She appears right around where I expect. I can counter the crossbow. I close in and see the curved knife. I try to get fancy and parry. I get cut up a little bit. I misjudge a swing and get cut some more. Great. I’ve got the plague. And I’m hurt bad to boot. I step back to try to heal and misjudge my hiding spot. The crossbow finishes me.
On my way back I try to do the Mindflayer pair near the steps (going the back way still) quickly. The first is no problem but as I sprint for the second I see him getting that lightning ball ready for me. I roll and am astonished at how fast the sword strike is from it. Now I really do have some chest puffing to do.
This time I land the parry on Ms. Red. I still get the plague but I win. I make my way up to the key and the lying jerk above the idol(10). I kill him of course. I’m still plagued and using my crescent grass to stay alive. Right before the jump point for the treasure I use my one and only Plague Be Gone Flower. I figure I’ll land the jump, kill the Fool’s Idol and be done for the night. I gracefully watch the ledge fly by my right hand side. At the very least I can release Freke on my way back (since the key I just mentioned is to his cell).
By this time I’ve learned my lesson that magic isn’t hiding me very well so I switch to Firespray. I land the jump this time (hurray, my Plague Be Gone Flower has been replaced). I enter the giant doors to the church and remember I should take out the little guys before aggroing their Idol. I use firespray and decide that low level fireballs are indeed overpowered. I rush the Idol and do some heavy damage to her. She disappears. I run around some pillars and figure out which one is the real one. A couple well placed arrows shows her she’s not fooling anyone. She’s back to one identity again and I rush out. Right into a Rune Trap. She takes this time to very importantly do nothing. I must have missed one of her parishioners and he comes running out, also pretty much doing nothing. I turn to kill him for his insolence and eat a barrage of magic. It’s a little tangy with a side of death.
I return to the Church with a different spell. I use some archery skills to take out ALL of the gentleman in their Sunday’s best. I slather my sword with magic. Two hand that son of a gun and CHAAAAAAAAAARGE!
I do a whole heck of a lot of damage this time. She splits. Literally. I track down the real one with some arrows. She goes back to being a single lady. I barely reach her but manage a couple hits. She’s down, but not quite out. I hide near the altar. I spot the real one immediately. One well placed arrow later (always aim for center mass) and I have my victory. The gargoyles take me kicking and screaming(11).
I know there’s treasure down there still dammit(12)!
(1) The Fool’s Idol is also known as “iron pyrite.” She is the first boss in the Tower of Latria area and appears as a member of the church, preaching to a mass of undead parishioners. She also has some extra arms which becomes even more after she makes duplicates of herself
(2) Demon’s Prank is a spell that makes a sound to attract enemies. Theoretically you can use this to direct an enemy to another location to get the drop on them. In my experience all it does is tell them someone is there in the first place. Whoops
(3)Lord Rydell is a whiny dead guy whose ghost is jailed in Latria. His ghost spends its time shaking the cell door and being a crybaby. He’s practically useless but for some reason I normally get the key (in a different section of Latria) and let him loose. Slimer would have known to just pass through the bars
(4) If there’s one thing that really helps brighten up a dank mindflayer infested prison tower it’s a lady with crazy caterwauling. When you enter the Royal’s room she stops singing which is somehow worse. Then she becomes a merchant, because hey….if you’re still living, you gotta make a living
(5) Sage Freke is your classic venerable wizard. He’s just chillin’ out, maxin’, relaxin’ all cool; as he’s trapped in a prison overseen by the Fool(s Idol)
(6) So as you progress through the prison you come to a big mass that shoots magic at you. Turns out it’s one big pile of dead guys who have channeled their collective wills to come at you. I don’t wanna know what they were doing when they died but it seems like they were a pretty tight knit bunch
(7) Their jar armor also makes them unable to “retaliate” or “move in any way”
(8) Hello siege tower…what do you have waiting for? 467 crossbows all set on “repeat” (possibly “shuffle” as well)? Uh oh!
(9) The last real barrier to the boss is a Black Phantom NPC (unnamed). She uses a crossbow and a knife that can give you the plague and is invisible until you draw near. She’s located pretty close to right under a treasure jump point
(10) Up in the balcony of the church the Fool’s Idol holds sermons at is an undead guy just sitting there. He’s obviously doing something magical in nature and reassures you he’s not up to any trouble. Consider me not reassured
(11) There are gargoyles that take you kicking and screamin
(12) There’s a shiny shiny treasure behind the altar that I couldn’t get thanks to the gargoyles
Chapter 1Chapter 2Chapter 3Chapter 4Chapter 5
Continue to chapter 7
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Haha! I Won’t be reading your articles until after I play through the game once. I never do walk throughs or vids my first time. But it is soooooo tempting to read your stuff ’cause you do such a good and funny writing job 😀
must be strong
You can’t leave. You’re bound to the Nexus 😉
You have it wrong…the Nexus is bound to me! 😛
Well the important thing is that I’ll see you there (‘8
Archery beats everything. I like it. 🙂
Wait until I do this for Dark Souls in a couple years. The archery will be out of control
I could believe that, but only if I don’t do it before you. 😛
So it’s a race is it then?
It’s all you. The full thing for this game could be a short novel. You can deal with all that
I Must Be Strong! I Must Be Disciplined! But the tiny tiny indulgence I’ve allowed tells me that I am missing an amazing and entertaining rendering of DeS. 😛
The race is on: Grin’s creative twist or Skare’s scathingly funny take? Why not both!! A collaborative coop with shenanigans included! 😀
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